The firey death of pure-orange.net

(Editor’s note: Please enjoy all of the grammatical miscues, many have been done on purpose, but thank you to my copy editing friends for pointing them out…)

I know I’m not supposed to do this. It is the forbidden fruit of journalism. But I couldn’t not do it. It is really affecting me. It’s been Twenty days and counting. Twenty long days. That’s, like, almost three weeks. Or something. See, this is what happens when pure-orange.net falls into internet oblivion – time stops.

I’ve actually got a bet going that the crash of the Pure Orange internal servers is caused by John Canzano. He sent his minions after the server after years of Beaver fans bad-mouthing his quality journalism.

Totally joking.

If anything, John is equally as “bummed out” as I am that the Pure Orange site is down. Now that I think about it, I have no where left on the internet to go to feel better about myself. Show me a site with more laughter-ensuing tomfoolery by way of paranoid and illogical fandom than that place. There isn’t.

A short background for those in other parts of the country: Pure Orange is a Oregon State Beaver fan forum. It is a group of a hundred or more rabid Beaver fans. They are often the most dedicated and loyal fans (it actually warms my heart a little) but, also are often the most paranoid and neurotic ones, as well. For the most part, if something is happening in Beaver Nation they know about it, if it’s good (a Beaver victory, recruit signing) they love it, if it’s bad (a Beaver arrested by the cops) they can’t understand why it happened.

So, with Pure Orange being gone, I guess I’ll have to start scouting Myspace for people to laugh at now… wait, MySpace? Does that site even exist anymore?

::clicks over to myspace.com::

What the heck is THAT? THAT is Myspace now? Well, that’s different. It looks like myspace tried an overhaul. They never quite got to haul, they’re just over.

But I digress.

Actually, when I heard that pure-orange.net was down I was originally relieved. I thought to myself, “Well, now all those guys can go outside and make real friends.”

They can have some social interaction outside of a football game. Perhaps lighten up a bit. Go on a vacation.

Okay, so exaggeration aside, they aren’t all bad. I actually like some of those guys. And a handful of the people on that site are good people and decent fans who keep to themselves and love their team.

The rest, well…

And to continue my honesty, deep down I want the best for all of them. I really do. But, there has never been a place of more over-stresssed, paranoid and up-its-own-backside fans than that place.

And I’ve been to Philadelphia! (Zing!)

But the original feelings over relief only lasted about a week. Then I began to wonder.

Where will I go when I want to laugh at delusional football fans? I don’t live in Syracuse anymore, I can’t just walk into any bar. Where will I go to make sure that I’m still hated by a small group of people who haven’t participated in an athletic sport since the Cold War ended? I mean, I don’t exactly know how to get under the skin of internet trolls EVERYWHERE.

And what will I ever do without – at least one or two – Beaver fans complaining after the first turnover in a game, The guys who call for Mike Riley’s head. Then back up after the game and say that Riley is the best thing to happen to the program since the invention of the helmet?!?

No where!

There is no where else on the planet that I can find these people! I’ve looked! The fans aren’t as paranoid at Syracuse. The fans at Texas A&M aren’t as lemming-like. And Montana fans just don’t care enough.

The Beaver fans of pure-orange.net have created quite a little oasis for me, and I never knew what I had until it was gone.

Sigh.

Such is life, though. So, I send my best wishes to the folks of pure-orange.net. I hope you return soon. If not, I wish you all a happy healthy rest of your life. Should you resurface at some other website, please let me know.

Or maybe I’ll just google, “Nick Lilja sucks” next week and find it for myself.

Cheers!